Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Herman Cain Defends Herman Cain

Herman Cain held a press conference yesterday afternoon in which Herman Cain denied even knowing Sharon Bialek, the woman who accused Herman Cain of groping her, and Herman Cain said Herman Cain had never assaulted anybody ever.

“They simply didn’t happen. They simply did not happen,” Cain insisted of the accusations of inappropriate sexual behavior, and at least one incident of alleged sexual groping, when he was head of the National Restaurant Association from 1996 to 1999.

Herman Cain also said that it was the “Democrat machine” that was behind the allegations, but Herman Cain could not provide any evidence of such a conspiracy. So far, Herman Cain has blamed the media and the Rick Perry campaign for the story, but Herman Cain said that Herman Cain would continue the race for the Republican nomination in spite of the stories.

Herman Cain also has an annoying habit of using the third person a lot.