Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Buh-Bye Bachmann

I thought she’d never leave.

Michele Bachmann Wednesday morning announced in Iowa that she would suspend her presidential campaign after a disastrous finish in the first-in-the-nation caucus voting on Tuesday.

“Last night the people of Iowa spoke with a very clear voice, so I have decided to stand aside,” she said, putting her campaign in the past tense

She walked through the history of the country and criticized “ObamaCare” in her much-awaited announcement before confirming her departure from the race.

“I am not motivated in this quest by vain glory,” she said this morning in her West Des Moines news conference. The sudden stop came after she fought through just one early state’s contest.

In her little departure speech, she described how the passage of the healthcare bill was her sole motivator to get into the race in the first place: so she could singlehandedly repeal it and save the world from Socialism. The rest, like convert everyone to Jesusosity, was just icing on the cake.

The only thing I’ll miss about her is her amazing ability to come up with gob-smacking nutsery to the point of stunning awesomeness. She’s the one that makes Rick Santorum seem like a rational candidate.