Friday, November 16, 2012

Hunting Party

I was reminded by Thom Paulsen on Interlochen Public Radio that yesterday was the start of deer hunting season in Michigan.  Or, as it is also known, St. Venison’s Day.

I lived long enough in that part of the country to know that now is not the time of year to go for a walk in the woods while wearing a brown coat or pulling out a white handkerchief.  The woods are crawling with folks in Elmer Fudd hats, and blaze orange becomes the fashion in the woods and in town.

If you’re up there, watch out for the drivers of overstuffed SUV’s and butched-up pickup trucks from downstate; they live for their week as the primal hunter out for his kill and a six-pack of Hamm’s.

(Okay, this was just my excuse to pull out this video of Da Yoopers horsin’ around, don’tchaknow.)

3 barks and woofs on “Hunting Party

  1. (Only a six-pack? How about Gilbeys?) Once upon a time gas stations sold 50 pound bags of carrots with which to lure the deer. And left them on the ground when they returned to the wife and kids in Hamtramk or East Toledo. Such garbage was an attraction to varmints like raccoons and possums and kept them fed throughout the winter. In the spring these followers of human garbage also liked the eggs of ground nesting birds such as grouse and wild turkey. This of course accounted for the drastic drop in the numbers of these great woodland dwellers, the near extinction of the wild turkey in North America. The resulting alarm caused the Michigan DNR to outlaw leaving trash in the woods, in spite of the howls from the hunters (“you expect us to haul away shoulder-high piles of corn and carrots along with our trophy carcass?”).

    In any case, there are more white tail deer in the USA now than were here when the Pilgrims landed and they’re a menace not only to themselves (diseases kill and spread) but to the invading homeowners with their pretty gardens. When you see deer in downtown Philadelphia you know you have a problem.

  2. Well, darlin’, when deer hunters shoot convertibles on the side of the road cause they thought it was a deer, it’s time for this old gal to stay home or hit the bookstore in the mall until these “hunters” clear out of the woods.

    I always worry about the livestock during, and sometimes out of, hunting season. Anybody can mistake a cow or horse for a rabbit, squirrel, turkey, deer, or bear…. right?

    For my part, I would slam the hunters back down on their couches and rely on wolves, panthers, and other natural predators to manage over-populations of herd animals. *I make no brief for coyotes, I hate the damned things and truly wish that every “hunter” who thought it was a cool idea to bring coyotes to the mountains of East Tenn and Western N.C. for their hunting recreation comes down with a severe and untreatable case of boils.

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