Thursday, December 18, 2014

The Next Austin Powers Movie

I don’t think I’ve seen any of the Austin Powers movies since the first one (and only that under duress), but the news that North Korea has put the kibosh on the release of The Interview by threatening world domination sounds like a rejected treatment for a sequel.

Seriously; the “hermit kingdom” can tell America what movies it can watch?  And since when did a country that can barely make soap come up with the capability to hack like a college kid from Cornell?

Monday, December 15, 2014

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

A Modesty Proposal

Remember when some folks got all worried that somehow someway the secret Muslims would impose Sharia law on us all and make us live up to the strict moral codes of Islamic law?  They were sure that we would be told what to wear and how to act and be forbidden to do lots of other things that would destroy our very way of life.  Laws had to be enacted to protect us against such a terrible fate.

But it looks like it’s too late.  Sharia law has taken over the Montana state legislature.

Some female lawmakers have criticized the Montana Legislature’s new dress code as unfair to women.

The new code, in addition to calling for women to wear suit pants, dresses or skirts, tells women to be “sensitive to skirt lengths and necklines,” according to Helena news station KXLH.

I’m impressed that they still allow women into the capitol building.

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Just A Simple Wreath Will Do

Decking the halls gets dangerous.

Police said they charged 53-year-old Richard Carter with attempted homicide for shooting at his neighbor on Saturday afternoon.

Talk about your war on Christmas….

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Manson Family Values

I can’t get married to a man in Florida (yet) because it would destroy the sanctity of marriage and because two men getting married is just wrong.

But serial murderer Charles Manson can get married to a woman even though he’s in prison for the rest of his life because marriage is a holy institution created by God to preserve the family and protect children.

Right.

In fairness, if Charles Manson wanted to marry a man, he’s allowed to in California.

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Chicken Word Salad

Speaker John Boehner is outraged that a White House official used a barnyard epithet to describe Benjamin Netanyahu, the Prime Minister of Israel.

Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio) on Wednesday said that profanity-laced attacks on Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu from senior Obama administration officials were an implicit reflection of President Obama’s views, adding that the official who called Netanyahu “chickens—” should be fired.

[…]

Boehner said that the administration officials should be dismissed. “The president sets the tone for his administration. He either condones the profanity and disrespect used by the most senior members of his administration, or he does not,” Boehner said.

And Mr. Boehner should know because he’s an expert at setting the tone and calling people “chickenshit.”  According to Steve Benen, the Speaker used the term to describe candidate Barack Obama in 2008.  Oh, and now he wants the president to go on an apology tour to Israel.

The White House isn’t in a rush to apologize to anyone.

“[That’s] an interesting observation by the Speaker of the House, who has a penchant for using salty language himself,” [Press Secretary Josh] Earnest said. “It’s a little rich to have a lecture about profanity from the Speaker of the House.”

Good to hear from you, Mr. Boehner.  Keep in touch.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word

Even when he’s demonstrably wrong, New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie (R) cannot admit it or even show a tad of humility.  TPM watched him try to extricate himself from his Ebola quarantine fiasco yesterday:

It’s not surprising that he tries to claim he didn’t change the policy. That’s standard for polls, particularly ones like Christie. But he actually claims that the nurse was symptomatic for Ebola (not true) and had a temperature (not true). They held on to her for 24 hours and now that she apparently doesn’t or no longer has Ebola they’re letting her go. Its a tour de force of projectile nonsense, with a high viral load of derp.

Not only that, but he refused to apologize for keeping her in a tent without running water.  (A tent?  WTF?  Don’t they have hospitals in New Jersey?)

Nurse Kaci Hickox is planning to sue.  Good luck; no amount of legal action or medical help will alter the fact that Chris Christie is a sphincter.

Friday, October 24, 2014

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Open Door Policy

Via the Washington Post:

The man who jumped the White House fence this month and sprinted through the front door made it much farther into the building than previously known, overpowering one Secret Service officer and running through much of the main floor, according to three people familiar with the incident.

An alarm box near the front entrance of the White House designed to alert guards to an intruder had been muted at what officers believed was a request of the usher’s office, said a Secret Service official who spoke on the condition of anonymity.

The officer posted inside the front door appeared to be delayed in learning that the intruder, Omar Gonzalez, was about to burst through. Officers are trained that, upon learning of an intruder on the grounds — often through the alarm boxes posted around the property — they must immediately lock the front door.

After barreling past the guard immediately inside the door, Gonzalez, who was carrying a knife, dashed past the stairway leading a half-flight up to the first family’s living quarters. He then ran into the 80-foot-long East Room, an ornate space often used for receptions or presidential addresses.

Gonzalez was tackled by a counterassault agent at the far southern end of the East Room. The intruder reached the doorway to the Green Room, a parlor overlooking the South Lawn with artwork and antique furniture, according to three people familiar with the incident.

Yikes.  I know there have been cutbacks at the Secret Service, but WTF?  This follows the revelation that the Secret Service didn’t know that someone had fired seven shots with an assault rifle at the White House and hit the windows in the family quarters until a housekeeper found broken glass.

And it’s not like this particular president hasn’t faced more threats than previous occupants.

Monday, August 25, 2014

Breaking News

The folks at CNN have their priorities.

CNN host Ana Cabrera said on Sunday that it was “heartbreaking” to see images of broken wine bottles after a magnitude 6.0 earthquake hit Napa, California.

In the aftermath of the quake that injured nearly 90 people in Napa alone, Cabrera invited Silver Oak winery CEO David Duncan to talk about photos of broken wine bottles that he had tweeted.

“We did have some damage, a few barrels — we had three barrels fall, and some wine bottles went down,” Duncan explained. “I tweeted a picture this morning.”

“We’re showing it to our viewers right now,” Cabrera pointed out. “It’s heartbreaking to see that image, especially if you are a wine lover. But also knowing that this impacts your livelihood.”

Duncan noted that the earthquake damage was not going to be “that big of a hit” for his winery.

Sure some people were critically injured and houses burned down, but to lose that glorious, crisp, cabernet that goes so well with any dish; oh, the heartbreak.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Extra Crispy

The phoenix is a mythological bird that bursts into flames, dies, and is reborn from the ashes.  It looks like they have two-thirds of that equation going on at a solar energy plant in California.

Phoenix-4Workers at a state-of-the-art solar plant in the Mojave Desert have a name for birds that fly through the plant’s concentrated sun rays — “streamers,” for the smoke plume that comes from birds that ignite in midair.

Federal wildlife investigators who visited the BrightSource Energy plant last year and watched as birds burned and fell, reporting an average of one “streamer” every two minutes, are urging California officials to halt the operator’s application to build a still-bigger version.

The investigators want the halt until the full extent of the deaths can be assessed. Estimates per year now range from a low of about a thousand by BrightSource to 28,000 by an expert for the Center for Biological Diversity environmental group.

The deaths are “alarming. It’s hard to say whether that’s the location or the technology,” said Garry George, renewable-energy director for the California chapter of the Audubon Society. “There needs to be some caution.”

If they could get chickens to fly by, Col. Sanders would be out of business.

Thursday, July 10, 2014

Beyond Belief

From the Washington Post:

A Manassas City teenager accused of “sexting” a video to his girlfriend is now facing a search warrant in which Manassas City police and Prince William County prosecutors want to take a photo of his erect penis, possibly forcing the teen to become erect by taking him to a hospital and giving him an injection, the teen’s lawyers said. A Prince William County judge allowed the 17-year-old to leave the area without the warrant being served or the pictures being taken — yet.

The teen is facing two felony charges, for possession of child pornography and manufacturing child pornography, which could lead not only to incarceration until he’s 21, but inclusion on the state sex offender data base for, possibly, the rest of his life.

I have a couple of questions.  First, how is it not committing the same felony for the cops to take a picture of a 17-year-old kid’s erection?  Second, how many of the adults involved in this case have been guilty of doing exactly what this kid is accused of?

Saturday, June 28, 2014

Check For Pods

The election results in Oklahoma brought to you by SyFy:

Timothy Ray Murray 06-28-14On Tuesday, Timothy Ray Murray (pictured) challenged longtime incumbent Rep. Frank Lucas (R-OK) for the Republican nomination in Oklahoma’s 3rd Congressional district. Murray lost, but he did manage to pull in 3,442 votes, good for 5.2 percent of the total. Now Murray says he will contest the outcome of the election. Because, he says, Lucas is dead and has been replaced by a “look alike.”

“The election for U.S. House for Oklahoma’s 3rd District will be contested by the Candidate, Timothy Ray Murray,” Murray wrote in a press release posted on his campaign website. “I will be stating that his votes are switched with Rep. Lucas votes, because it is widely known Rep. Frank D. Lucas is no longer alive and has been displayed by a look alike.”

On the website, Murray claims that Lucas and “a few other Oklahoma and other States’ Congressional Members,” were executed “on or about” Jan. 11, 2011 in southern Ukraine.

[…]

The bizarre charge was first reported by KFOR TV in Oklahoma City. The station reported that while Oklahoma election board officials had also received Murray’s press release, Murray had yet to file a formal petition to contest the election. The station also sought comment from Lucas, who said that he had never been to Ukraine.

“Many things have been said about me, said to me during course of my campaigns,” Lucas told KFOR. “This is the first time I’ve ever been accused of being a body double or a robot.”

I think we’ve seen this movie before.

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Friday, June 6, 2014

Surprise, Surprise

David Brooks says President Obama was right.

It doesn’t matter if Bergdahl had deserted his post or not. It doesn’t matter if he is a confused young man who said insulting and shameful things about his country and his Army. The debt we owe to fellow Americans is not based on individual merit. It is based on citizenship, and loyalty to the national community we all share.

Soldiers don’t risk their lives only for those Americans who deserve it; they do it for the nation as a whole.

It doesn’t matter either that the United States government ended up dealing with terrorists. In the first place, the Taliban is not a terrorist organization the way Al Qaeda is. America has always tried to reach a negotiated arrangement with the Taliban, and this agreement may be a piece of that. In the second place, this is the dirty world we live in. Sometimes national leaders are called upon to take the sins of the situation upon themselves for the good of the country, to deal with the hateful and compromise with the loathsome. That’s their form of sacrifice and service.

So President Obama made the right call.

Naturally he has to find fault somewhere, so he does it by complaining about the Rose Garden announcement with Bowe Bergdahl’s parents, but that’s his instinctive (and probably RWN-mandated) response.  He can’t help it.  But I give him credit for the rest of it.

If that’s not enough to make you spit-take your Starbucks, here’s Charles Krauthammer, who has never had a nice thing to say about President Obama ever, also on his side.

Speaking on “Special Report,” Krauthammer told Fox News host Bret Baier that Bergdahl should face an investigation over allegations that the soldier left his post in Afghanistan on the night he went missing. However, he insisted that the White House did the right thing by bringing him home first.

“Look, had the choice been mine, I would have made that same choice,” Krauthammer said. “It’s a difficult decision and I would not attack those who would have done otherwise.”

[…]

Krauthammer said that the United States, along with other Western countries, “always comes out on the short end” in hostage swaps. He included Israel in this, pointing to when the country gave up 1,000 Palestinian prisoners in return for one sergeant.

“The reason we put a value on the individual human life the way that the ones at the other end of the table don’t,” Krauthammer said. “That’s why we always end up with unequal swaps.”

If neither of them backtrack in the next twelve hours after getting tons of hate mail from real ‘Murkins, then I’d say we have something noteworthy going on here: sensible and reasonable response from the right to something Barack Obama did.

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Thursday, May 8, 2014

Friday, May 2, 2014