If the Republicans had any sense (okay, that’s a stretch right there), they would be all over the idea of gay marriage. Why? The money!
It’s a well-known stereotype that all gays have lots of disposable income – no kids and none of those dull obligations that burden straight married couples. All gays have really cool jobs that let them earn tons of money so they can summer in P-town, Fire Island, and Saugatuck and winter in Key West and Fort Lauderdale. And of course we all have wonderful taste in fashion and style – Queer Eye proves that – so when we plan a party, we always have the best of everything.
So just imagine what’s going to happen when the wedding industry gets their hands on the gay population. Not only will there be a marked increase in business (the couples were lined up around the block for a week in the middle of a San Francisco winter – if that ain’t love, what is?), they will be able to sell the top of the market stuff – none of this Target Club Wed stuff; we’re talking Williams-Sonoma here. And what about the honeymoons? Cruise lines (pun intended) and resorts could make a fortune on the happy couples, and the couples-only resorts could rake it in with all sorts of packages for the newlyweds. Speedo, Ralph Lauren, Birkenstock, L.L. Bean, A & F, and Tommy Hilfiger could double their profits on trousseaus alone.
So I’m kind of surprised that the Republicans can’t see that the idea of gay marriage could be so good for so many business that it alone could provide enough jobs to stimulate the economy and maybe even wipe out the deficit. But no, the Republicans are letting their morals get in the way of prosperity. How ironic – that’s usually a liberal stand.