Monday, August 27, 2012

Conventional Wisdom

The Republican Convention will kick off a day late in Tampa thanks to the threat of Tropical Storm Isaac, so I’m guessing the gay bars in Ybor City and the strip joints elsewhere will get some extra business today. Yip yah.

I’m not going to rain on the GOP’s parade. Let them have their fun of Obama-hating, gay-bashing, warmongering on women, birtherism, and demonizing everyone that isn’t white, straight, and Jesus-shouting. (Aw, they had to cut Donald Trump because of the storm. Bummer.) If these folks want to wallow in their unbearable whiteness, let them have their fun. Mitt Romney will get some kind of bounce out of it, which will send the Villagers into paroxysms of twitterpation over how close the race is, and then wait with bated (if not gin-soaked) breath until the Democrats convene in Charlotte and they do their version of the partisan rag.

The only mildly interesting news out of the convention is former Florida Gov. Charlie Crist’s endorsement of Barack Obama. That really scattered the pigeons, but anyone who’s watched Mr. Crist over the last few years saw it coming, and the rumors that he’ll challenge Rick Scott for governor in 2014 have been nearly as rampant as those about his private life since he got hammered by Marco Rubio in the 2010 Senate race.

Call it liberal bias, but I’m not going to devote too many pixels to the GOP wet blanket party over on the other coast. I’ve been watching conventions since the 1960’s and they’re basically studies in foregone conclusions, right down to the spontaneous demonstrations cued to the second. But if I wanted a constant stream of whining, bashing, and misogynistic and hateful rants about how horrible life is under the brutal heel of that secret Muslim Kenyan-born gay socialist coke-snorter, I’d subscribe to a certain family member’s Facebook page.

Knock yourselves out, Republicans.