Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Dungeons & Dragons

Via TPM:

A group of self-appointed “patriots” are moving forward with an idea for a planned community of several thousand families of “patriotic Americans” in Idaho, a project named The Citadel, envisioned as a “martial endeavor designed to protect Residents in times of peril (natural or man-made).”

“The Citadel is not profit-driven. The Citadel is Liberty-driven: specifically Thomas Jefferson’s Rightful Liberty,” the group organizing the project says on its website. “Marxists, Socialists, Liberals and Establishment Republicans will likely find that life in our community is incompatible with their existing ideology and preferred lifestyles.”

The idea for The Citadel was born in the “Patriot Blogosphere” in early 2012, according to the project’s website. The Idaho Stateman reported on the project last month, but it gained widespread attention in the past week. Organizers hope to purchase land in 2013 for The Citadel, and break ground soon after.

I don’t know a whole lot about building fortifications — other than the ones I built with my friends in the basement out of old sofa cushions and lawn furniture — but it sure reminds me of the ground plans of a P.O.W. camp. I’m guessing that within a month of the place’s existence, someone’s going to start planning on building three tunnels — Tom, Dick, and Harry — plotting a break-out, and stealing a motorcycle.

Notice the wall towers, though. They’re for fending off the hordes of Orcs.

7 barks and woofs on “Dungeons & Dragons

  1. As it has been stated elsewhere, why attack such a construction from the ground? Dragons always strike from the air, wiping out defenders with their breath weapon, and then bombardment from the air. The area between the two walls doesn’t look like it is large enough to grow food for all the people inside, so unless they have a large stockpile of food and water, a siege would not last long. plus, there isn’t any indication for where refuse is treated – they may be able to get groundwater, but they sure as heck don’t want to have their latrines mixing in with it. This is a fantasy town, IMHO, without the magic and very little reality based planning to it.

  2. This sort of resembles the retirement centers with assisted living for the old and feeble I’ve been checking out recently. I wonder what they’ll do with Grannie when she loses her marbles…. stick her upright in the ground so she doesn’t take up valuable space?

  3. I’m reminded of a (rearmed) medieval city. Think York, or Chartres, or Prague. Frankly, I’d think they’d be at more risk from the rest of the community than from outsiders. And the walls aren’t likely to deter tanks and heavy artillery, never mind aerial attack. You’ll notice that the “neighborhoods” are just inside the walls: nothing like putting your homes in easy reach of the mortars the “enemy” parks outside.

    Walled communities. Because nothing keeps you safer from your armed, wingnut neighbors like keeping everyone not already in the city at bay.

  4. They have an arms factory but no farmland? You can’t eat bullets. They must think this will be a self-sufficient community, but it couldn’t be less self-sufficient since it relies on a wider societal infrastructure to exist (if it ever gets built).

    And where are the churches? And who the hell is John Parker? Or was that a typo for John Galt?

    • A) When your Trinity is the Cannon, the Gun and the Holy Mortar, your munitions plant IS your church. The church(es) is(are) probably buried somewhere in the Town Center section. Interesting, given how Gawd-fearing these volk are, that houses of worship aren’t explicitly pointed out – but by not doing so, at least they’re avoiding the Koresh curse.

      B) Farms are outside the walls, usually. But I don’t see any granaries, warehouses or other storage facilities. So they’re probably able to grow/raise anything they need – but perhaps not as able to store it in some presumably defensible location. Maybe they expect Monsanto, ConAgra and ADM to join them in isolation(ism) and keep them supplied from afar…

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