Saturday, December 13, 2014

Shiftless Thievery


1960 Ford manual transmission 04-15-13Police say two carjackers almost got away with a vehicle near Ocala’s downtown skating rink Wednesday night — but they didn’t know how to drive a stick shift.

Ocala Police Department officers spoke with the owner of a 2014 Toyota Corolla near the city’s ice skating rink. The man told them he was sitting in his car talking on his cellphone when a man with a gun tapped on the driver’s side window. Another man stood by the passenger’s side window.

The gunman demanded he get out of the car and hand over his money. The victim said he told the man he didn’t have any cash. The robber ordered him to give him his wallet, which he did. The robber then demanded his keys, a report states.

The victim handed over the keys and quickly walked away from the car and headed west toward Southeast First Avenue. He said he saw the robbers trying to drive away, but they had trouble making the car move.

The victim, meanwhile, stopped another motorist and asked the person to call police. Before officers arrived, the robbers ran from the car, which still had the keys in the ignition.

Kids these days.

Friday, December 12, 2014

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Thursday, November 20, 2014

From the Department of Obvious

Via TPM:

Texas Gov. Rick Perry (R) admitted on Wednesday that it was a bad idea to run for president in 2012.

“I was a bit arrogant,” he said in an interview with the Washington Post about his bid for the White House.

Perry said that he thought he was prepared to run the country after serving as Texas governor.

“I was mistaken,” he said.

You don’t say.

Oh, by the way, he’s thinking about running in 2016 because he’s totally ready now.

Thursday, September 25, 2014

I’m Seriously Thinking About Getting A Cat

If I got a cat I can put up pictures of it reacting to external stimuli on this blog instead of attempting to make sense out of life.

Because it seems the world has gone nuts and trying to keep up with people obsessing about coffee cup salutes is just exhausting.

Here’s Steve Benen on the situation.

Even by the low standards of our 2014 political discourse, this is pretty depressing.


Beltway Republicans have suggested the “Latte Salute Election” may be a worthwhile 2014 theme, and the National Republican Congressional Committee has even launched a fundraising campaign, urging donors to hand over money because the president saluted Marines while holding a coffee cup.

Yep, this is what contemporary politics has come to.

What’s even more depressing is that the NRCC will rake in a pile of dough because they know that there are people who will give them a shitload of money over something like this.  They know their base; they know there are plenty of pigeons to be plucked.

(Okay, I’m actually not going to get a real cat.  Snowball has been with me for over fifty years and his litter box has yet to turn into a haz-mat site.)

Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Way Beyond Stupid

I sometimes think that there are those elected officials who come up with gob-smacking stupidity just to test the creative limits of people who read what they say and then try to explain it to others.

Case in point: Rep. Jeff Miller (R-FL).  He’s a climate-change skeptic of the first order.  He thinks it’s naturally occurring and there’s nothing we can do about it, and like a Creationist, he uses storybook paleontology to make his point.  He had this to say to MSNBC’s Richard Liu:

“Well, I think anybody would answer a poll and say that they believe the scientists, but you have to understand that it is not settled science,” Miller said. “The issue of climate change has been happening for a long time, and for us to be able to think that we, as matter of fact, can change what’s going on right now to any substantive measure is really kind of foolish in my opinion.”


“But, manmade, isn’t that the question?” Lui pressed.

“Then why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Were there men that were causing — were there cars running around at that point that were causing global warming? No,” Miller concluded. “The climate has changed since Earth was created.”

The dinosaurs went extinct because an asteroid smashed into what is now the Yucatan peninsula and wiped out almost every living thing on the planet through climate change.

At this point you’d almost wish for another asteroid to put us out of our misery.

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Top Stupid of the Day

If you’re going to compare Obamacare to iron-bound socialism, it might help if you knew the name of the socialist paradise you’re using as an example.

A Republican Congressman tried, but failed, to compare Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius to the North Korean dictator during a House Energy & Commerce Health Subcommittee hearing on Wednesday afternoon.

The comment came during an exchange about the effect of preventive services on health care premiums under the Affordable Care Act. Sebelius disputed Rep. John Shimkus’ (R-IL) claim that offering prevention benefits without cost sharing would increase beneficiaries’ health care expenses. “There is no free lunch, Madam Secretary!,” Shimkus charged. “When you mandate coverage, it is rolled directly on premiums, premiums increase, that is paying for these services!” Sebelius responded by arguing that investing in prevention could decrease costs down the road.

Shimkus grew visibly agitated by her explanation and tried to compare Sebelius to the leaders of North Korea. But rather than referencing the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea (DPRK), Shimkus likened the Secretary to the “Republic of Korea” or South Korea, America’s ally in the region. “Alright, I got it. We’re just going to agree to disagree. It’s like talking to the Republic of Korea or something,” he said.

All those people look alike anyway, right?

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Girl Talk

The GOP outreach to women marches on.

As Republican candidates figure out how to best win over women voters, Iowa GOP Senate candidate Mark Jacobs thinks he has the answer: appeal to their emotions.

In an interview Sunday with WHO-TV in Des Moines, host Dave Price asked Jacobs what the “biggest difference between men and women” is, in terms of reaching out to them as voters.

“I think you have to connect with women on an emotional level,” said Jacobs. “And with a wife of 25 years and an 18-year-old daughter, I’ve had a lot of coaching on that.”

Yeah, forget all the stuff about pay equity or reproductive rights; they don’t understand all that kind of talk.  Oh, and be sure to catch them at the right time of the month, too.

Friday, December 6, 2013

Top Stupid of the Day

And the winner by a mile is Rick Santorum who compares the battle over apartheid in South Africa to Obamacare.

Rick Santorum said Thursday that Nelson Mandela had fought against “some great injustice” — apartheid — just as Republicans are fighting against the great injustice of Obamacare.

“He was fighting against some great injustice, and I would make the argument that we have a great injustice going on right now in this country with an ever-increasing size of government that is taking over and controlling people’s lives — and Obamacare is front and center in that,” Santorum said Thursday in an interview with Bill O’Reilly on Fox News.

The worst part of this gross stupidity is not only are there people who walk on their hind legs who believe this bullshit, but it also trivializes the epic struggle millions of black South Africans went through for generations by comparing it to a law that improves the lives of citizens.

That moves it beyond just ordinary stupid to evil.