Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Number of the Day

Five — That’s the number of games that Marlins manager Ozzie Guillen is suspended for after saying something stupid about Fidel Castro in an interview with Time magazine.

Zero — The number of people outside of Little Havana who give un culo de rata about what anyone else says about Fidel Castro.

Number of the Day

Five — That’s the number of games that Marlins manager Ozzie Guillen is suspended for after saying something stupid about Fidel Castro in an interview with Time magazine.

Zero — The number of people outside of Little Havana who give un culo de rata about what anyone else says about Fidel Castro.

Monday, April 9, 2012

Annals of Journalism

An Orlando TV station. Fox News 35, reported over the weekend that “civil rights groups” are patrolling the streets of Sanford, Florida, in the wake of the Trayvon Martin shooting.

Florida members of the Detroit-based National Socialist Movement tells FOX35 they are patrolling the streets of Sanford. — The white rights organization says several Sanford citizens have called on them fearing their safety.

Well, that’s what they had up for a little while until someone pointed out that “white rights” and “civil rights” are not exactly the same thing.

The station has now updated the page.

Annals of Journalism

An Orlando TV station. Fox News 35, reported over the weekend that “civil rights groups” are patrolling the streets of Sanford, Florida, in the wake of the Trayvon Martin shooting.

Florida members of the Detroit-based National Socialist Movement tells FOX35 they are patrolling the streets of Sanford. — The white rights organization says several Sanford citizens have called on them fearing their safety.

Well, that’s what they had up for a little while until someone pointed out that “white rights” and “civil rights” are not exactly the same thing.

The station has now updated the page.

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Armed In Tampa

The Republican Convention in Tampa later this summer is sure to be a fun time despite the fact that you won’t be allowed to bring certain dangerous weapons to the festivities.

Hoping to head off violent protesters during the Republican National Convention, Mayor Bob Buckhorn has proposed a litany of items that will be considered security threats during the week-long event.

The list runs from air pistols to water pistols and also includes items such as masks, plastic or metal pipe and string more than six inches long.

Conspicuously absent from the list of potential weapons: Firearms.

That’s because state law bans local governments from placing any restrictions on the carrying of guns in public spaces.

Super Soakers out; Glock 9mm pistols in.

But hey, given Florida’s recent history with gun laws, what could possibly go wrong?

Armed In Tampa

The Republican Convention in Tampa later this summer is sure to be a fun time despite the fact that you won’t be allowed to bring certain dangerous weapons to the festivities.

Hoping to head off violent protesters during the Republican National Convention, Mayor Bob Buckhorn has proposed a litany of items that will be considered security threats during the week-long event.

The list runs from air pistols to water pistols and also includes items such as masks, plastic or metal pipe and string more than six inches long.

Conspicuously absent from the list of potential weapons: Firearms.

That’s because state law bans local governments from placing any restrictions on the carrying of guns in public spaces.

Super Soakers out; Glock 9mm pistols in.

But hey, given Florida’s recent history with gun laws, what could possibly go wrong?

Monday, March 5, 2012

How Inspiring

This has Titanic vs. Iceberg written all over it.

The Florida House voted 88-27 Thursday to give final approval to a bill that allows school boards to set policies that would allow students to offer “inspirational messages” at school events, including mandatory gatherings such as student assemblies. The bill now goes to Gov. Rick Scott.

Scott didn’t give a firm yes or no when asked Thursday whether he would sign the bill, but he is expected to do so. “I haven’t seen the bill, but I believe in Jesus Christ, and I believe individuals should have a right to say a prayer,” he said.

The vote ends several years of effort by Sen. Gary Siplin, D-Orlando, and Rep. Charles Van Zant, R-Keystone Heights, who has a Masters of Divinity and who also attended Western Baptist Theological Seminary. Siplin’s measure passed the Senate a week ago.

Van Zant said that the bill was not about prayer, but about “inspirational” messaging and free speech. He also said student-crafted messages — faculty and staff are banned from involvement — would bring a tone of respect and civility to the classroom.

He noted that much has happened — for the worse — in the 50-plus years since the U.S. Supreme Court banned compulsory prayer in schools.

“Before we removed inspirational messages, the No. 1 problem was talking out of turn,” Van Zant said. “Now, it’s drug abuse.”

Translation: “inspirational” = “Jay-sus Is Lord!”

Mr. Van Zant may think he knows something about problems in school, but take it from someone who not only taught school but also was one of those kids who spent a lot of time with his friends coming up with ways to amaze and annoy the administration: if they had handed me and my pals a gift like this, you would have heard “inspirational” messages ranging from paeans to Jimi Hendrix to hymns in praise of Elbereth.

I can’t wait for the first graduation ceremony at a high school in rural Florida to feature a Wiccan prayer, or a Druid tree-worshipping benediction. Maybe they’ll tone it down and celebrate a shrub.

Just curious; I wonder how much money the Florida legislature is going to set aside to pay for the inevitable lawsuits?

How Inspiring

This has Titanic vs. Iceberg written all over it.

The Florida House voted 88-27 Thursday to give final approval to a bill that allows school boards to set policies that would allow students to offer “inspirational messages” at school events, including mandatory gatherings such as student assemblies. The bill now goes to Gov. Rick Scott.

Scott didn’t give a firm yes or no when asked Thursday whether he would sign the bill, but he is expected to do so. “I haven’t seen the bill, but I believe in Jesus Christ, and I believe individuals should have a right to say a prayer,” he said.

The vote ends several years of effort by Sen. Gary Siplin, D-Orlando, and Rep. Charles Van Zant, R-Keystone Heights, who has a Masters of Divinity and who also attended Western Baptist Theological Seminary. Siplin’s measure passed the Senate a week ago.

Van Zant said that the bill was not about prayer, but about “inspirational” messaging and free speech. He also said student-crafted messages — faculty and staff are banned from involvement — would bring a tone of respect and civility to the classroom.

He noted that much has happened — for the worse — in the 50-plus years since the U.S. Supreme Court banned compulsory prayer in schools.

“Before we removed inspirational messages, the No. 1 problem was talking out of turn,” Van Zant said. “Now, it’s drug abuse.”

Translation: “inspirational” = “Jay-sus Is Lord!”

Mr. Van Zant may think he knows something about problems in school, but take it from someone who not only taught school but also was one of those kids who spent a lot of time with his friends coming up with ways to amaze and annoy the administration: if they had handed me and my pals a gift like this, you would have heard “inspirational” messages ranging from paeans to Jimi Hendrix to hymns in praise of Elbereth.

I can’t wait for the first graduation ceremony at a high school in rural Florida to feature a Wiccan prayer, or a Druid tree-worshipping benediction. Maybe they’ll tone it down and celebrate a shrub.

Just curious; I wonder how much money the Florida legislature is going to set aside to pay for the inevitable lawsuits?

Friday, March 2, 2012

Short Takes

Syrian forces overwhelm the rebels in Homs.

A wounded French journalist made it out of Syria.

The Blunt amendment failed to pass the Senate.

The Maryland marriage equality bill has been signed; it goes into effect in January.

You only thought the Michigan primary was over.

Jobless claims fell to a four-year low.

The bomb squad checked out a suspicious package for Rush Limbaugh at his home in Palm Beach. (Maybe it was his heart.)

Short Takes

Syrian forces overwhelm the rebels in Homs.

A wounded French journalist made it out of Syria.

The Blunt amendment failed to pass the Senate.

The Maryland marriage equality bill has been signed; it goes into effect in January.

You only thought the Michigan primary was over.

Jobless claims fell to a four-year low.

The bomb squad checked out a suspicious package for Rush Limbaugh at his home in Palm Beach. (Maybe it was his heart.)

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Short Takes

Iran — The U.S. sees no plans by them to build a nuclear bomb.

More people are dead in Afghanistan over the burning of the Koran by U.S. forces.

Syria — Wounded are being evacuated from Homs.

Yemen gets a new president.

Nelson Mandela is hospitalized.

Big place — small crowd: Mitt Romney spoke to 1,200 at Ford Field, which seats 65,000.

Miami Beach State Rep. Richard Steinberg (D) resigns over sextexting. Hey, at least he wasn’t driving….

Short Takes

Iran — The U.S. sees no plans by them to build a nuclear bomb.

More people are dead in Afghanistan over the burning of the Koran by U.S. forces.

Syria — Wounded are being evacuated from Homs.

Yemen gets a new president.

Nelson Mandela is hospitalized.

Big place — small crowd: Mitt Romney spoke to 1,200 at Ford Field, which seats 65,000.

Miami Beach State Rep. Richard Steinberg (D) resigns over sextexting. Hey, at least he wasn’t driving….

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Short Takes

Syria is not taking well to suggestions from the UN to make nice.

Iran rattles its sword over the Straits of Hormuz again.

Israel thinks an Iranian who blew himself up in Bangkok was planning to bomb the Israeli targets.

House Republicans and Democrats have worked out a tentative deal to extend the payroll tax cuts and jobless benefits.

The economy is looking up, and so is President Obama.

Want to speed in Florida? Become a cop.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Short Takes

Russia defends its support of Syria.

Greek austerity talks are stalled.

Mitt Romney says it will be a long road to the nomination.

There may be a deal on the mortgages after California and New York sign on.

Texas begins enforcing its anti-abortion sonogram law.

There was a major drug bust here in Florida.

A rich man who adopted his girlfriend faces a legal challenge.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Short Takes

Puppet Masters — The Syrian government got a bunch of people to rally in support of their president.

The search continues for cruise shipwreck survivors.

It’s South Carolina primary day. Yip yah.

The Supreme Court orders a lower court to try again on the Texas redistricting.

Home prices are likely to keep falling this year.

A South Florida teen posed as a cop, now tries being a doctor.

The Miami Dolphins have hired Joe Philbin as their new head coach.

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Short Takes

Iraq — Another bombing, more deaths.

A cruise ship ran aground and tipped over off the coast of Italy; several deaths have been reported.

Europe — Their debt being downgraded isn’t helping.

The U.S. is renewing ties with Burma/Myanmar.

Cynical Ploy? — Newt Gingrich is telling his SuperPAC to pull their ads in South Carolina. They won’t.

“Friends” with Big Brother — A federal security contractor monitored social networks.

Slipped a Mickey? — A South Florida TV weatherman claims he was drugged and robbed by women from the Russian mob.

R.I.P. Richard Threlkeld, 74, reporter and correspondent for CBS and ABC.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Short Takes

Mexico has been hit by an earthquake.

Panama’s former dictator, Manuel Noriega, is heading home to prison.

Russians rally against Putin in Moscow.

The climate change conference in South Africa ends with a landmark agreement.

The GOP held its 13th debate last night. (You’d think at some point they’d get it right.)

The Los Angeles Times reports that U.S. drones are being used in local law enforcement.

Sports — Baylor’s Robert Griffin III won the Heisman.

In Florida, a dog shot a hunter.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Pissed Off

Your turn, Governor.

A reporter with Comedy Central’s “The Daily Show” showed up at Gov. Rick Scott’s budget unveiling Wednesday to ask him to take a drug test — a reference to the testing he wants to impose on state employees and welfare applicants.

The reporter, Aasif Mandvi, stood up in the middle of the governor’s questioning, and asked Scott if he would be willing to take the test since he too was using “hundreds of thousands of taxpayer dollars” in carrying out his job.

“I’ve done it plenty of times,” the governor responded.

Encouraged by the answer, Mandvi then tried to get other reporters to pass a pee-cup up to the governor, drawing a few complaints from executive staff.

“I hate to keep harping on this, but would you pee into the cup?” he asked repeatedly.

Scott returned to questions from other reporters, and never took the cup.

Kudos to Random Pixels.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Short Takes

Libya — Secretary of State Clinton was in Tripoli to meet the new bosses.

The Israeli/Hamas prisoner swap won’t help the hard feelings.

There was yet another GOP debate, this time in Las Vegas.

Big Surprise — The Supercommittee is not making much progress.

Postage rates will go up in January.

Oops — Miami-Dade jail accidentally releases a convicted felon.

Tropical Update — Here’s where all the wind and rain is coming from here in South Florida.