Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Next Time, Get A Stripper

This sounds like something out of a Peter Sellers movie:

A Trump Cabinet member who was with the President the night he launched a military strike in Syria characterized the attack as a form of “entertainment” on Monday.

Reflecting on last month’s strike, ordered as Trump hosted Chinese President Xi Jinping at his Mar-a-Lago estate, Secretary of Commerce Wilbur Ross said: “It was in lieu of after-dinner entertainment.”

“The thing was, it didn’t cost the President anything to have that entertainment,” Ross said at the Milken Institute’s Global Conference in California, according to Variety.

Requests for comment from the Commerce Department and the White House were not immediately returned.

Maybe we ought to hire a clown next time.  Oh, wait…

Wednesday, November 30, 2016


Dan Quayle was seen at Trump Tower.

For those of you too young to remember, Vice President Dan Quayle was the reason many Americans — Democrats included — prayed nightly for the continued good health of President George H.W. Bush and that when the news flash came from Tokyo that Mr. Bush had suddenly taken ill, the instant horror was that Mr. Quayle might be anywhere close to assuming the duties of higher office, let alone monitoring a spelling contest.

And now he’s being escorted to the seat of power by Kellyanne Conway.

Monday, November 28, 2016

Invoking The 25th

Following up on the post below, Trump took to Twitter to put forward the much-debunked theory that he would have won the popular vote, too, if it wasn’t for those meddling illegal voters.

President-elect Donald J. Trump said on Sunday that he had fallen short in the popular vote in the general election only because millions of people had voted illegally, leveling the baseless claim as part of a daylong storm of Twitter posts voicing anger about a three-state recount push.

“In addition to winning the Electoral College in a landslide, I won the popular vote if you deduct the millions of people who voted illegally,” Mr. Trump wrote Sunday afternoon.

The series of posts came one day after Hillary Clinton’s campaign said it would participate in a recount effort being undertaken in Wisconsin, and potentially in similar pushes in Michigan and Pennsylvania, by Jill Stein, who was the Green Party candidate. Mr. Trump’s statements revived claims he made during the campaign, as polls suggested he was losing to Mrs. Clinton, about a rigged and corrupt system.

I have a serious question for anyone out there who is a lawyer familiar with the Constitution; specifically with the 25th Amendment.  That’s the one that provides for an orderly transfer of power if the president is unable to fulfill his duties due to death, resignation, or disability.  Section 4 of the amendment provides for the Vice President and the cabinet to determine that the president is incapable of doing his job.

Is there a provision in the 25th Amendment for what to do if the president is incapacitated due to mental disease or defect?  Who makes the determination?  What’s the breaking point?  Then what?

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Wednesday, October 26, 2016

An Odd Crop Of Supporters

There was a mild kerfuffle when the father of the Pulse nightclub shooter showed up at a Clinton rally in Orlando last summer, which proves only that unless you’re Dick Cheney and can have the Secret Service screen out people in the parking lot, it’s tough to prevent some deplorable characters from showing up.  But via Miami New Times, this batch at a Trump rally is worth noting.

So who is this new face of Trump’s elusive black support?

He’s none other than Michael the Black Man, also known as Maurice Woodside or Michael Symonette, who has made waves in Miami in recent years with protests against the Democratic Party and rallies for the GOP.

He’s also a former member of the murderous Yahweh ben Yahweh cult, which was led by the charismatic preacher Hulon Mitchell Jr., who was charged by the feds in 1990 with conspiracy in killings that included a gruesome beheading in the Everglades.

Michael, along with 15 other Yahweh followers, was charged for allegedly conspiring in two murders; his brother, who was also in the cult, told jurors that Michael had helped beat one man who was later killed and stuck a sharpened stick into another man’s eyeball. But jurors found Michael (and six other Yahweh followers) innocent. They sent Mitchell away for 20 years in the federal pen.

In the years that followed, he changed his last name to Symonette, made a career as a musician, started a radio station in Miami and then re-invented himself as Michael the Black Man, an anti-gay, anti-liberal preacher with a golden instinct for getting on TV at GOP events. He’s planned events with Rick Santorum and gotten cable news play for bashing Obama.

Since 1997, he’s been charged with grand theft auto, carrying a weapon onto an airplane and threatening a police officer, but never convicted in any of those cases.

So why is he supporting Trump? Reached on his cell phone in Lakeland, he said he likes Trump’s plan to lower taxes, but also offered a complicated answer tying Hillary Clinton to a range of racist activities.

“One reason is because Hillary’s last name is Rodham, and their family members are Rothchilds, who enslaved 13,000 slaves as collateral,” he says. “She’s also on camera kissing the head of the Ku Klux Klan and saying, ‘That’s my mentor.’ That’s all on my website.”

I bring this up because at the Trump rally yesterday in Miami there was someone holding up one of Michael’s signs with the URL blacked out (so to speak) and it was held by a white person.

blacks-for-trump-10-26-16Um, okay.

Tuesday, October 4, 2016

Holy Sniff

Pat Robertson explains the mysterious sniffing of Mr. Trump.

Trump sniffing may have been a sign of the Holy Spirit coming out of him.The Holy Spirit affects people in strange ways. Some people go into a frenzy, some people start laughing uncontrollably, some people bark like dogs. Apparently, Trump sniffs.

I would have gone with the barking, but hey, I’m not a religious con man.

Monday, September 19, 2016

Hurts When I Laugh

Gary Johnson, put down the bong, dude.

Libertarian Party presidential nominee Gary Johnson stated over the weekend that he was “just grateful that nobody got hurt” by an explosion that injured 29 people in New York City’s Chelsea neighborhood.

During a Sunday interview on CNN, host Brian Stelter asked the candidate to respond to the explosion that left 29 people injured Saturday night.

“First of all, [I’m] just grateful that nobody got hurt,” Johnson stated. “Secondly, law enforcement is on the scene, responders are on the scene. If there’s anything I learned having been governor of New Mexico for eight years is that these people really do care, they are really qualified.”

The cause for legalizing marijuana — for which Mr. Johnson is an advocate — just took a few steps back.

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Well, There Was That

How quickly he forgets:

Speaking in Youngstown, Ohio ahead of Donald Trump, Rudy Giuliani, who was the mayor of New York City on 9/11, declared that Islamic extremists hadn’t carried out any terror attacks on American soil before Barack Obama’s presidency.

“Under those 8 years, before Obama came along, we didn’t have any successful radical Islamic terrorist attack in the US,” Giuliani told the crowd. “They all started when Clinton and Obama came into office.”

Except for this:

New Yorker 9-11 cover 09-08-06

Wednesday, July 13, 2016

Another Reason

This is just one more reason why I still do not own a smart phone.

According to the Washington Post, three places within the D.C. museum are PokéStops, or real-world locations where players can collect items to be used in the game.

Andrew Hollinger, a spokesperson for the Holocaust Museum, told BuzzFeed News that playing the game “in a memorial dedicated to the victims of Nazism is extremely inappropriate.”

And I still think they are subversive devices sent by an alien civilization to prepare the world to be taken over by cats.

Monday, April 18, 2016

Short Takes

Ecuador earthquake toll passes 240.

Brazilian congress votes to impeach President Dilma Rousseff.

OPEC fails to reach agreement on freezing oil production.

Airline pilot reports drone strike near London airport.

Rough weather in the Rockies and Midwest.

The Tigers won two of three from the Astros over the weekend.

Friday, March 25, 2016

Tourist Trap

Here’s a novel way to address terrorism:

“Not only do I believe that President Obama should immediately return to America, I am inviting him today to come to Florida and address the concerns of American tourists considering travel to Europe,” Scott said in a statement released Thursday.


In his statement, Scott explained that “as the tourism capital of America,” Florida would be “the perfect place” to give an address alleviating the fears of Americans who plan to travel to Europe.

And pick up a dozen grapefruit in a lovely gift package while he’s here.

Friday, March 18, 2016

Control Freak

Working for this guy sounds like a nightmare.

Volunteers on the mission to “Make America Great Again” are apparently chill with signing away their First Amendment rights.

According to a report from the Daily Dot, which got ahold of a leaked contract from Donald Trump’s presidential campaign, volunteers are forbidden from speaking ill of the real estate magnate or any of his family members—for life. The contract also forbids volunteers from jumping ship and working for another presidential candidate “should they change their minds.”

“For life.”  Sheesh.

To be accurate, their First Amendment rights are intact since the Trump campaign is not a governmental agency, and the First Amendment only restricts what Congress can do, not private citizens or corporations.  And as the article points out, the contract is laughably unenforceable.

Still, it’s like he gets his ideas from Kim Jong-un.

Thursday, November 5, 2015

Alien Encounter

Dr. Ben Carson says the pyramids in Egypt are not tombs of the pharaohs.  They’re grain silos built by Joseph… or perhaps by visitors from another world.

In the course of his explanation, Carson said “And when you look at the way that the pyramids are made, with many chambers that are hermetically sealed, they’d have to be that way for various reasons. And various of scientists have said, ‘well, you know there were alien beings that came down and they have special knowledge and that’s how-’ you know, it doesn’t require an alien being when God is with you.” (emphasis added).

Do we really want a president who gets his daily briefing from the National Enquirer?

Monday, November 2, 2015

Know Your Enema

On Meet the Press, David Brooks has the cure for what ails us: Jeb! the laxative.

Via C&L:

DAVID BROOKS: If I were him I’d lead with his strengths. And just say, “I’m boring. I’m boring. Is our problem in Washington we don’t have enough boringness? No. We’ve got too much craziness. And so I’m going to be a sedative. I’m going to be a laxative, I guess. You know, I’m going to calm you down.”

CHUCK TODD: Well, that will now trend on social media.

Yeah, probably, and while I’m not an M.D., I don’t think a laxative is the same thing as a sedative.

Hey, it could have been worse: he could have compared him to a feminine hygiene product… and the bag it came in.

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Gander Sauce

Sen. Lindsey Graham on federal aid for storm victims now:

Sen. Lindsey Graham is asking for federal aid for his home state of South Carolina as it battles raging floods, but he voted to oppose similar help for New Jersey in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy in 2013.

“Let’s just get through this thing, and whatever it costs, it costs,” Graham told CNN’s Wolf Blitzer on “The Situation Room” on Monday of the devastating floods in his home state.

Sen. Lindsey Graham on federal aid for storm victims three years ago:

According to roll call votes for both the House and Senate versions of the Hurricane Sandy relief bill, almost all of South Carolina’s Republican delegation voted against providing funds to flood-stricken New Yorkers in the wake of the storm.

Yet now Sen. Graham doesn’t seem to recall that vote:

“I’m all for helping the people in New Jersey. I don’t really remember me voting that way,” Graham said.

Pressed further, he said: “Anyway, I don’t really recall that, but I’d be glad to look and tell you why I did vote no, if I did.”

Yes, you did.

Thursday, September 17, 2015

Beat By The Clock

The story about the kid who happened to be Muslim who built an alarm clock and touched of a xenophobic panic in his public school in Texas is a microcosm of just how seriously stupid, cowardly, and bullying this country has become in the last fifteen years.

Seriously, people.  What the fuck?

The saving grace is that President Obama is effectively trolling every breathless bedwetter out there and inviting Ahmed Mohamed to bring his science project to the White House.

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Thursday, July 2, 2015

Thursday, June 11, 2015

Welcome To The Information Age

Diane Rehm, who otherwise is a reasonable and reliable interviewer, blew a whole in the bottom of the boat yesterday.

WAMU radio host Diane Rehm falsely stated in an interview with Bernie Sanders on Wednesday that the Vermont senator has dual Israeli citizenship.

In an unusual exchange in the middle of the interview with the recently declared 2016 Democratic presidential candidate, Rehm said she got the information about his alleged citizenship from a “list.” Rehm’s show is heard on National Public Radio-affiliate stations across the country.

She later apologized and explained that she’d read about his citizenship on Facebook.  Yeah, the same place your crazy uncle posts pictures of President Obama as a witch doctor and your source for videos of cats dancing with chipmunks.